I was raised as a flawless bird having no restrictions imposed. Raised in a family of four, there were no boundaries of happiness.
My family was a paradise to live in, where choice, privacy, education and freedom were the priorities.
After completing my graduation in commerce, I started working in a Software Developer company as a Digital Marketing Executive. Life was beautiful family, friends and the job I loved to the core.
Time has wings and yes the D Day had to be selected and I had to get married. Not struck by the cupid, arrange marriage was the option I had. With few meetings, family gatherings I selected the man of my life, an Engineer by profession. Having met several times after engagement I learnt we shared great chemistry together. I found myself to be the luckiest girl in the world. It was all before marriage. The hunky dory between us broke in few days of our marriage.
My life changed, it had to be. I was loaded with responsibilities which I don’t deny I should be aloof of, but expected a support. Waking up to an alarm at five and handling every household chores single handedly was new to me. After I finished every household chore, I would run to office which is 20 kms from my house. I didn’t want to leave my job, I loved it. After a hectic day at work, I would cook food for my new family which I loved, keeping in mind their likes. But, had they accepted me the same way I did them? The complaints had started rather sooner than i had expected.
“Your roti’s are not soft, next time make sure you prepare soft. Your father-in-law use to throw away plates if he was not satisfied with the taste. You are safe he has not done to you yet.” said my mother-in-law.
I hardly had the time for my husband. He loves to chat with me late night but all due credit to my day routine my senses do not support my heart’s wishes and I fell asleep, giving little attention to my husband’s personal desires. My little attention to him due to very busy schedule made him skeptical and very possessive. Lately, his private meetings with my mother-in-law and sisters had brought a change in him. A swift change!
I was sure he would understand, he is my husband after all. But no, he did not. He checked my social media accounts, my handbags, phone details and even asked me inappropriate questions. He doubted my character! According to him, I had an affair outside marriage. I was close with friends but was loyal to my husband.
The fire took a ferocious turn when I fell sick. My brother-in-law had visited my house for few days with my younger sister-in-law. He took care of me and made sure I had medicines and food in time when my husband was on work.
My mother-sister-in-law took less interest as they believed, the reason behind everybody falling ill was me. Post marriage, my husband had to undergo stone operation, mother-in-law fell and broke her arm which led to a surgery later and the little one (my niece) had viral fever. All these happened in a span of one week. They called me ‘apshakun’ belief, meaning cursed.
“I was not allowed to go to office, I worked like a machine at home, even when sick, alone. Nobody cared for me. They considered my marriage cursed. Then blamed me for having an affair with my brother-in-law, who later stopped coming to our house to prove them wrong.”
“Added another superstition, I was not allowed to sleep in my bedroom with my husband, when I was in period” “When I opposed and I was called a modern spoilt”.
My world was shrinking leaving me helpless. My parents wanted me to come back home but I had faith in my relation with husband, I wanted to give a chance but it turned out to be a mistake on the same night. One night, he checked my email account, one created in my school days by one of classmates who used it for staying in touch with school mates.
Image Source: www.theindiansun.com.au
My husband thought it was me who chatted with other men. He abused me with the words. I was thrown away on floor, he hit me hard, pierced his nails while I tried to rescue and gave bruises for life. I tried to speak but was shut down upon by a slap. He not only broke my phone but also my trust and love that I had for him. I was bleeding with pain, a pain which will recover but will not leave its effect.
The little hope in me died when he refused to understand. I wrapped my bundle of emotions along with the bags and left my in-laws. Nobody stopped me, no one. That was the worst!
I didn’t make any mistakes. I am eligible for happiness, love and respect and the very good character, which was blown by these people. They took me as a parcel of sadness that was spread in their house, which I was really not. I came to my parents, who embraced me with all their love.
“My divorce is in process and I do not regret, as I am self obsessed. I love myself as I know that there is nothing I had done for which I had to be shameful. So, I proudly tell people yes, I am getting divorced and I have come a far away!”
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Working women are Characterless?
Being a working women spoils your character? Why does someone’s presence create an illness in family and considered a curse? It’s a total crap! It’s you who need to maintain the hygiene and she is neither responsible for the stone in your bladder nor for the viral fever. So, kindly have some logical sense!
Women cannot have male friends outside marriage? I wonder why people in mass have mentality that a woman and a man cannot be just friends. I don’t believe women should ever return to such men who take women as puppets and sex object.
Seek love, care and respect from a family, do not just compromise considering it as a MARRIAGE. This is the problem with Indian wives and bahus, they compromise hell and forget to give them the beautiful part of life. If you are one amongst those women facing domestic violence, buckle up ladies, kiss them a goodbye and embrace happiness.
Image Source: humanillnesses.com