woman man argue

You split due to unequal thoughts, and not equal status

“Why do you want to waste your money on her education? You won’t get back anything!” asks a guy in a gibberish way to a hopeful dad.

Dad replies, “Correct yourself buddy, it’s not ‘wasting’ but ‘investing’ money, the money which ‘I’ earn is equally ‘hers’ and if I will educate her, she will educate one whole family as well as her next generation! And this is what I will get back.” and he smiles.

When we talk about educating and empowering women, we thank to our feminist instincts but when the time comes to select your wife or daughter-in-law, you will usually rely on the gharelu types who will obey your orders(of being a good homemaker as, using housewife is derrogatory?) and work for you all day. No doubt this is the perfect example of being a hypocrite! Well now, what marriage is, should be our next question.

A great marriage is not when the ‘perfect couple’ comes together. It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences, rightly quoted by Dave Meurer. No two people are born identical in this world. Starting from the basic features (whether your origin is Roman or Greek) to the way you have internalised your personality, brings out your compatibility level. It is impractical ‘to think’ as well as ‘to be’ compatible with everyone. It is also untrue, to say that like minded people can always stay together happily. Few things which bind and hold a successful marriage is love, respect, care, trust and ofcourse compromise and sacrifice.

Where does women empowerment pop in as one of the reasons of increase in divorce rates? Even if it’s there, won’t it bring more balance in the society? Men would respect their women for the knowledge they hold, for the work they do and also feel proud about the way they give justice to their professional and personal life. If you think, women is the base of a family so, empowering a woman means empowering a family.

Why would a woman suffer like a slave ever in her life? Why would she be the victim of physical and sexual abuse only because she married to a cruel man. It is far better to dump him, escape and live independently. It’s true, 80 percent of divorces take place due to women’s complain against their husbands. Why wouldn’t she complain if she is exploited! Why will she sacrifice self respect and blindfold society and live as if it’s her fate! Earlier, women silently used to suffer whatever was in her ‘fate’ as, she was financially reliable on her husband. But today, she is at par earning and raising her progeny single handedly(in few cases) successfully. Is this wrong? I doubt if you are still wondering that empowering women would boost up the divorce rates. Now that there is equality(if any), there should be less divorce happening as, both think equally and responsibly. No one is inferior or superior to the other. Unfortunately, scenario is just the opposite. Too much of patriarchy I say. Period.

Media and technology is to be blamed to an extent. You can only find the reports and features on rape and murder and not a single article on how women empowerment has a role to play in transforming the country drastically. It basically degrades the institution of family. The more logical reasons of divorce are- Increase in the number of DINKS (Double Income No Kids) couples, stress of modern life, loneliness, change in gender roles and professional rivalry.

As Barbara Streisand aptly says- “Why is it that men are permitted to be obsessed about their work, but women are only permitted to be obsessed about men.” This is how we conclude.

Image courtesy: jagoinvestor.com

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